The Atom Bomb

Last Wednesday was a day of waiting for news. Lee was going to be in a meeting with PNC as to the future of his employment after the merger of PNC Bank and RBC Bank. It was also the day that my father in law went in for testing to determine when he'd have a hip replacement. We got the news that we were expecting in terms of my father in law. That's not the case with Lee.

Lee's meeting with PNC wasn't a solo meeting. PNC met with Lee's entire mortgage division to tell them the future of their employment. It also had nothing to do with their skill level or their work ethic. All it had to do with was whether or not PNC already had people like them within the bank. Lee wasn't worried at all or at least didn't appear worried. He thought that PNC would take them along for the merger. We knew that we might have to be relocated to maybe Raleigh or even Pittsburgh because of the merger. So the time of the meeting came and Lee went into the meeting. I was at home in our apartment. I asked Lee to send me a simple yes or no as to the status of his employment as soon as he knew. Then my phone let me know I had a BlackBerry Message. It was one word. No. Lee had been displaced as well as his entire division by PNC.

My heart just sank. I had a feeling before the meeting that this would be the word that I would see. I just knew it. I don't know how I knew it but I did. Then all of the questions started to flow into my mind. How could they not take my husband? How could the bank that I've been dealing with since I was 17 just steamroll my husband like that? How could they do this to us? How could they just drop an atom bomb on all of our hopes and dreams for the next year?

Lee came home about 2 hours after the meeting. He was so upset. I've never seen him that upset before. I had to be strong for Lee. I knew that if I showed him right away that I was heartbroken by this news that it would make him feel so much worse. I hugged him and told him that everything would be alright. We sat down and I listened to how the meeting went. My heart broken watching him cry. Lee finally worked himself back up to going back to work because the work day wasn't done yet. As he walked out the door he apologized for me to come all the way from Memphis just to be unemployed with him. And then the door closed. I cried as soon as the door closed. I knew that there was a little drama with that statement but it just made me want to cry. I made sure I got all of the crying out of my system before Lee came home so I didn't make him feel like he let me down or that I was disappointed in him in any way.

Almost a week later, I'm very angry and upset still. How could MY bank do this to us? I cry almost every day about it. I've experienced my dad being out of permanent work for over 5 years and the financial struggles that can happen because of that. It's not exactly something that I want to be dealing with and I don't want to have this kind of heartache so early in my marriage to Lee. I cry because I feel like all of our dreams are on hold now. In my mind, these aren't dreams that we can afford to put on hold. These are dreams that we need to accomplish now. However, that's just not the plan God has for us. Lee says that he knows that God has a plan for us but he wishes that it would be just a little clearer to him right now. I AGREE! I'm not very positive about how everything is going to turn out based off of previous experience. I'm not holding out hope for things to be alright. Lee has another meeting this week to see if PNC can put him somewhere else within the company which also might require a move. If not, as of March, Lee will be out of a job.

I ask that you pray for Lee and myself as we deal with this news and try to figure out God's plan for our lives and marriage. It's still a very hard pill to swallow and not where we saw our lives heading so early in our marriage.