I've gotten a lot of friend requests on Facebook lately from people that I went to high school with. I honestly haven't talked to them since graduation day and wonder why on earth they want to be friends with me now. I accept their requests most of the time and then take a look at their pictures to see what they've been up to since high school. To my surprise, most of these people have gotten married and had at least one child since graduation. These discoveries has lead to a feeling that I'm honestly not to sure about. I feel very far ahead and yet very far behind.
I feel very far ahead because I've got a few things that they don't have. I have a full time job with health insurance and a lot of other wonderful perks (like a retirement fund......It feels weird thinking about retirement at the ripe old age of 23). I have a BA which led me to the full time job.
I feel very far behind because I'm not married yet or have any children. I know that I'll have them one day. For right now, I'm finding myself being jealous of what they have.
Sitting back and thinking about all of this made me realize that there aren't "check points" for 20 somethings post college. Think about it. From the time we're born, our parents look for milestones within our lives; the first smile, the first word, the first steps, the first day of school, getting your driver's license, becoming a legal adult.....the list goes on and on. They all have specific ages attached to them. Once you graduate from college, those age related milestones suddenly disappear. Getting married doesn't have an age attached to it. Having children doesn't have an age attached to it. I don't know about anyone else but I feel lost between being ahead and being behind.
I know, because of my faith, that I'm both lost and found all at the same time. I'm also saint and sinner.......depending on the day and who you talk to depends on which one I am. I also know that at the end of the day, only two people have to be happy with me; me and God. I don't have to fit into the cookie cutter life that most of the people I went to high school with have. In this particular case, I'm breaking the mold and stepping out into something that they can only dream of. I need to ask God for His peace with where I am in my life's journey and trust that I'm following in the ways that I should be following.
"I alone know theplan I have for you, plans to bring about the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11
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